Plea

Sydney Walk
May 20th 1853

Darling Boo

I have been most dreadfully ill. After your card arrived with the joyous news of your safe delivery I had intended to visit you and your baby at the earliest possible moment, but that very afternoon I was struck with a terrible fever and have only just left my bed to come and write to you. Please forgive me, I know you will!

How is your beautiful baby girl, Angelina? Is she just like you, I am sure she is and cannot wait a moment longer to see her. I will ensure that I am fully recovered, though, before I come to gaze at her.

Josiah has been very attentive during my illness. He is a sweet lamb and I am very lucky. He came to my room on the first morning and told me he would oversee the running of the house until I was able to resume my position, the darling. I did not see Villiers or the maid once throughout my recovery, because Josiah undertook to give them all their instructions. I told Josiah that I did not wish him to contract the same fever so he did as I requested and left me alone. I have had several days of peace in which to get myself well again - there are many wives who would not have been given such luxury, I know.

I have knitted some mittens for your baby, Boo, just as I did for her brother, who must seem like a proper man to you now. Please tell me when I can come to visit - I cannot bear to think of her snuggling and cooing without her Aunt Effie to kiss her. I read your card but was unsure whether the arrangements included your closest friend,

E x

Overlooked

Sydney Walk
May 13th 1853

Boo sent us the birth announcement card this morning. It read,

Mr and Mrs Bradstone Pitt of Chelsea, London are proud to announce the safe and welcome arrival of their newest baby daughter. She is to be called Angelina Vivienne and will become the perfect younger sister to her brother Bradstone.

Together with some tedious information about when well-wishers can go to visit them, the details of which I cannot recall just at this moment.

I am most hurt and can only believe that Boo was in some form of post-puerperal stupor which rendered her incapable of choosing the names herself. Mr Pitt must have undertaken the task.

Why else would the baby be named Angelina - not Euphemia?

Epiphany

Sydney Walk
May 11th 1853

May the Lord preserve me from such troublesome times!

Yesterday, I witnessed a scene of such distress and violence that I hardly think those involved were human. I saw Villiers leave from the servants' outside door and go striding down the street as though he were being chased by bears - I followed, but could hardly keep up with his route, since I had left the house in a degree of haste and had not had time to have my boots laced. I was wearing my house shoes, which could never be described as robust even by the man who made them.

I hobbled along in Villiers' wake, not caring to notice where we were going, until we arrived at a corner I recognised. My heart turned as I saw that we were in the vicinity of Brunswick Square, our winter residence last year, and at the very spot where I had seen the Girl and her child from my window!

I rested a while, easing my poor feet, while Villiers marched out of sight. I wanted nothing more than to go home and spend a quiet morning with Dauncey but I felt compelled to see what it was that Josiah had told him to do - what task had so angered him - so after a few minutes I continued my steps.

As I reached the turn I had seen him take, I beheld a sight I could never have conjured up in the most frenzied ravings of the hottest fever. Villiers was standing at the top of a flight of steps, with his arms akimbo across the front door of a drab-looking but respectable house. At the foot of those steps was a heap of rags and baggage - and the prone figure of the Girl.

I walked a little further towards this scene, but was too afraid to make my presence known. I had not the faintest notion of what was happening, save for the obvious. Villiers was preventing the Girl from entering the house. But why?

"Mr Villiers, I am begging you - please do not do this to us. What am I to do - where will we go?" She was crying, and scraping the ground to collect her belongings together. "All I asked for was what is due to Jojo and me. Please, Mr Villiers, you know my situation - surely you can take pity on me and the boy?" I could now make out that part of what I had thought was just rags was actually a small child. The child was silent, staring intently at the Girl but otherwise showing nothing of what he felt.

Villiers began to lock the door and descend the steps. He had not spoken at all whilst I had been watching but now, quietly, he addressed the Girl.

"I have no choice, none at all," he said "You must make your way to the gentleman you are to marry and trust that he will give you shelter. I shall call for a carriage to take you to wherever he is - that is more than I need to do, but I am sorry for you." He put the house keys into his pocket and glanced around for someone he could send to find transport. That is when he saw me.

As our eyes met I could hide my presence no longer so I approached - as I did so, the Girl followed Villiers' gaze and as she saw me she screamed,

"You! You have come here to watch me in my destitution! Mrs Hatherwick, I have served you well, I do not deserve for you to gloat over my misfortune." She looked at Villiers as if to accuse him of double duplicity - evicting her from her home and inviting me to be the witness of her downfall.

I was about to dispute the notion that she had been a good servant - she had in truth been sullen and tearful throughout her time in service with us. But seeing her evident distress and shame, I felt it would be wrong to take her to task for her delusion. I said nothing, but I walked forward and gestured that I would help her stand if she would give me her hand. It is always better to be magnanimous towards subordinates, I have found - it costs little and cuts their whining short.

"Madam," Villiers addressed me with a strength not usually to be found in him, "I do not know why you are here. I can hardly think this scene is one you will enjoy - it is best you return to Sydney Walk forthwith."

"Thank you for your concern, Villiers, but I am perfectly capable of deciding my own actions. I wish to know why you are preventing them from enetering their home." The Girl began to cry again at this, and started raving at us both.

"It is not my home any more, you have seen to that! I have no home! Go away both of you, we do not need you or your charity - I only want what I am owed!"

"But what of the gentleman who lived here with you?," I asked her, "The friend of my husband for whom you were working - is he dead?" Perhaps my instinct had been right after all.

The moment I asked that question, the Girl shouted a great scornful sneer, while Villiers ran to her with his hands outstretched, as if to stifle her mouth.

"Ha! Dead? He is as good as dead, Ma'am," she scoffed, "At least he is dead to me and this poor boy!" She picked up the child, who clung to her but still made no sound.

"Madam, please turn and go back at once. There is really no cause for you to remain here," said Villiers. He turned back to the girl and passed some money into her pockets. "Take what I am giving you here and go to your intended - go now." He seemed not a little affected by the scene and was clearly fighting to control himself - he did not squeak, or flap, or perform any of his usual dances when agitated. It occurred to me that I had never seen him so controlled.

The Girl counted the money Villiers had given her, then collected her belongings and set off away from us, carrying that silent boy on her hip.

Villiers' face was a picture of torment as he moved towards me with a sweeping gesture, as if to wipe the previous fifteen minutes from memory. I walked ahead of him, not wishing for his company.

I had for some years come to hold Villiers in high regard but this morning had begun to shed light on some of his behaviour that had been of concern to me. As I walked back to our rooms, I began to make sense of it.

The conclusion I arrived at was shocking to me.

He is often out of the house at night - all night - something which none of the other servants were wont to do. After the Girl first left our employ, he would smirk and giggle whenever she was mentioned as if he knew something about her that I did not. His lack of concern for LB when he was charged with protecting him.

Villiers had got the Girl with child back at Blindingham. He had caused her to be dismissed and set her up in an apartment in London - where he had been living with her as man and wife! And now she has betrayed him with another man - a man she is free to marry - so Villiers has cast her out in a fit of jealousy.

His argument with Josiah can only have been because Josiah wished Villiers to take the Girl the money she had asked from him and Villiers thought she was not deserving of it.

How could I not have seen this before? How could all this have gone on under my roof and left me in all ignorance?

Hiatus

Sydney Walk
May 10th 1853

I had fully intended to take matters into my own hands this morning, after Josiah spoke sharply to Villiers again at breakfast. I was planning to ensure that the servants were all out or occupied so that they would not be witness to an angry exchange between husband and wife - I pride myself on having ensured throughout our marriage that Josiah and I have hardly had a cross word and any we have spoken have been entirely in private. I had left a note for Villiers instructing him to go shopping for the wherewithal for me to knit something for Boo's girl, and I knew the kitchen staff would be going to the markets.

As I approached Josiah's dressing room door - which was closed as usual and most probably locked - I could hear voices. Josiah was talking urgently to Villiers. They were both trying their best to whisper, but, being men, were unable to stay quiet for long.

"God damn you, man!" I heard my husband say. I could tell he was speaking through his teeth, which always makes him spit a little. I hoped for the sake of the laundry staff that he had already removed the silk jacket he had been wearing.

"Sir, please do not involve me any further - I am a faithful butler to you, you cannot gainsay me there - but I do not wish to carry out your instructions on this matter." Villers was pleading in his whiny way, but I could tell he was determined.

"You will do as I ask!"

"I will not!"

"You most certainly will!"

"Do not ask it of me!"

They argued this way like grown schoolboys for a minute or two, before falling into an enraged silence. Then I heard Villiers say,

"Very well, sir - as you are my master I must do your bidding. But I wish you to know that I object most strongly to your instruction. There is a child's welfare involved here, Sir. A child whose happiness should surely be of concern to you."

"Damn you, Villiers! You will not speak to me again about that child, except to tell me when he and his wretched, grasping mother have left that house. Now get out of my sight and go do as you have been ordered!"

This sounded quite final and I did not wish to be caught listening, so I rushed to my own room and stood where I could not be seen from the landing. Villiers threw the dressing room door open and - with a noise which was neither a sob, nor a roar but something in between - hurled himself down the stairs and through to the servants' quarters. My good intention to approach Josiah deserted me momentarily, as the door was slammed shut and immediately locked again.

Villiers was clearly about to go out to perform a task for Josiah - one which he was extremely reluctant to undertake. I reasoned that he would not want at the same time to be burdened with a choice of wools, so I moved as quickly as I could to retrieve the note I had left for him. It was at that moment I decided to follow him.

Delivery

Sydney Walk
May 9th 1853


Boo has had her baby. A ruddy-faced boy arrived at our front door carrying a note from Mr Pitt, telling me that Boo had been safely delivered of a beautiful girl (my heart did twist a little, I must confess, at the thought of having a girl baby to play with). They have not named her yet but the note said Boo was keen for Josiah and me to know of the birth before the announcement cards are sent.

I feel privileged to be so close to Boo and her family that we should receive such special attention.

A girl! A baby sister for LB to look after. When he was born I straight away sent some mittens or boots or somesuch knitted finery - I have neglected to prepare for this arrival in the same way, so shall send Villiers out for wool this morning and set about making something. I would go, since I love nothing better than a reason to visit shops, but Dauncey is not quite himself and I am loath to leave him. Besides, Villiers has a better eye than I have for fabrics and colours. He will be in his element when we come to redesign the interiors of the Hall.

Giving the game away

Sydney Walk
May 7th 1853

Is there any other wife in the land who has as much to endure as I have? I do not think that even in the company of the worldliest of women I could describe the events of the past day. My powers of deduction have been put to great use and my tolerance has been tested beyond all measure. I have once again determined that should my services as a wife and businesswoman be no longer required I shall present myself to the constabulary and find employment there. That would be preferable to the vexations of being a Lady with servants. The most outrageous demands are being put on me and I am at a loss as to what I am supposed to do next.

The Girl has found someone stupid enough to marry her - and she believes Josiah should present her with a dowry!

I found her crumpled and misspelt note in the deepest pocket of his silk night jacket - it has clearly been read a number of times, possibly thrown in the grate and retrieved, then used to clean his shoes for all I know. I read it and replaced it in the blink of an eye while Josiah was downstairs shouting at the postboy. I shall reproduce it now,

Josiah ( how dare she address him thus!)

I have had no word from you for days (why would she?) so am reduced to contacting you like this. I shall bring this letter to your door before daybreak so that your wife need have no sight of it. (Well it is some blessing, I suppose, that she is mindful enough of my feelings not to bore me with her goings on). The simple fact is that I can no longer survive as I have been and you should not expect me to. I must put food on the table for Jojo and myself. You have not been of any help to us for a long time now (since I insisted her wages should not come from us any more, I expect. The avaricious madam - was her income from the gentleman she worked for not enough?) so I have taken action to protect myself and the child.

I have accepted an offer of matrimony from a gentleman I met whilst walking Jojo in the park. (Goodness me! I walk in the park, too but have never been proposed to whilst doing so) I do care for him but mainly he has a good income. Jojo and I will be well looked after. I know his welfare is still important to you even if mine is not. (I did not understand this part, but she has always been prone to self pity so I assume it is nothing more than that. I well remember the snivelling and wailing she indulged in at Blindingham and during our first season in town)

My reason for writing is to ask you for a sum of money - enough to make it worth the gentleman's while taking us on. I will leave the exact amount to you to decide but do not leave it long before you get the money to me (the effrontery of the woman!) We plan to be wed by the Summer. You do not have to come to the wedding of course but you would be welcome, Jojo does ask after you (does he? Why?)

Send word straight away,

C

This familiar way of signing letters is abhorrent but I should not expect more of someone in her position.

So - we are being asked to fund her and her idiot child so that a man who should know better can
justify her hand in marriage. What on earth does any of this have to do with us - we have not been her employers for a year at least. Has she no other family?

No wonder Josiah is so incensed. He is an honourable man who will wish to recognise the service the Girl gave us for all those years, but not with a gift of money at a time when we need all that we have at our disposal to rebuild the Hall. He must be worried about how to accede to the spirit of her request without financial inconvenience to us. And he is obviously anxious to protect me from this knowledge, having realised - correctly - that my first instinct would be to deny her and her child anything they asked.

I shall have to devise a way to help Josiah through this without letting him know that I have found and read her note. I say again, my powers of detection, deduction and discretion are second to none!

Discovery

Mission statement

Sydney Walk
May 4th 1853

Boo has proved to be the trustworthy companion I always knew she was. I rushed to see her earlier today, with much on my mind to discuss with her. I could not put up with Josiah's ranting any more and was in sore need of a friendly ear - I know Boo does not hold Josiah in high regard but am not disposed to display much wifely loyalty to him of late. His mood since we returned from Blindingham has become blacker by the day. I have tried my very best to support him and help soothe whatever it is that is troubling him but he will have none of my ministrations, preferring instead to barge about the place and bark at the staff. I could bear that, I suppose, but I shall not be spoken to like that myself. So when he began to turn his dark demeanour towards me, I fled for the sanctuary of Boo's bosom (which is prodigious at the moment, I could hardly keep from staring at it).

I told Boo how struck with terror we all are when Josiah is at home at present - Villiers has taken to whimpering whenever he hears a door opening and the woman who cooks for us can be heard weeping throughout the day. Really, it is more than I should have to bear! Boo agreed with me and was anxious to connect Josiah's behaviour with the contents of that note from the Girl. I had not thought to assume his friend's death was still at the root of Josiah's bear-headedness - Boo thought that unlikely, too. It occurred to me that I was not actually sure that the note had indeed contained the sad news I envisaged. Boo stifled another one of her looks and urged me to try and ascertain the contents of the note - she is sure that it does not bear the news I had imagined.

We had a fine afternoon and a new form of sweet bread made with coconut - I think it was mixed with milk or somesuch but whatever it was was divine - and now I am back in our rooms, determined to search Josiah's things to find that note. Whatever news it does in fact contain, I shall be prepared and will make Josiah aware that I understand - but do not condone - his subsequent behaviour. He is a silly man for not trusting me with it in the first instance. I am his wife - what am I for, if not to tend to him and ease his pain?

Urgency

Sydney Walk
May 4th 1853


Dearest Boo


I am sorry to burden you with my troubles when you have so much to occupy your thoughts at this time, but I absolutely must speak and there is no other person on this good earth that I trust more than you. I know that what I tell you will stay with you and not reach the ears of any other living soul, save for the whisperings you may make to your unborn child. I fear, however, such actions may taint the pure innocence of that child - should it understand you.

My duty as a wife prevents me from writing any more here. I simply must see you at your earliest convenience. I shall tell the boy to wait for your instruction,

Soonest,

E x

Outburst

Sydney Walk
May 2nd 1853


Josiah is not himself, I am sorry to record. I shall not write much at the moment as he is downstairs and in one of the darkest tempers I have seen. I do not know what has caused this particular bout of anger, but I must do all I can to calm him. He spoke so sharply to Villiers at breakfast that I had to intervene. Villiers is in the servants' kitchen now, crying, and I have only come up to my rooms to look for smelling salts. I hope this mood does not last, as I have asked Papa to come for supper. I shall see what this afternoon brings before deciding whether or not to put him off from coming.

Part Exchange

Sydney Walk
April 27th 1853


Boo is as big as a house. She was not that size when full with LB, I am sure - I asked her whether she was quite convinced it was just one child she might be carrying but this did not make her laugh as much as I thought it would. Poor lamb - I have never hidden my envy of her state of motherhood but if I am to be truthful it is a clean, dressed sweet-smelling child I hanker after, not the terrible burden and pain that must be endured to achieve it.

Still, Boo was much amused by my story of Cook and the village people and she is, as I hoped, full of ideas for the new decorations for the Hall. She did become a little distracted when I told her about the note Josiah had received from the Girl - asking me quite curtly why I had not opened it. After I had explained my utmost respect for the fact that it was not addressed to me, she gave me a very strange look which I can only imagine was caused by the temporary discomforts suffered by women in her condition. She cheered up very quickly though and took the Press funds I had brought with me. She locked them away immediately, even before Mrs Doughty had arrived for our business meeting.

After the three of us had spent a very sensible hour discussing the workings of the Press - it is a thriving enterprise, I am assured and one which is attracting clients in increasing numbers - Mrs Doughty took her leave of us with the swiftest of polite farewells. I think she is worried that we still hold her responsible for LB's recent injuries, but really she must not concern herself any further with that. I may have to send her a note to reassure her.

I asked Boo to tell me all her news - I was aware that I had taken up most of the time with news of my own, but she seemed unwilling to say much at all. She said she was tired, so I kissed her, what bit of her I could reach over her swollen form, and came back to Sydney Walk. I shall retire tonight very happy that my life is once again normal - full of the good wishes of my friends, the satisfaction of knowing I am contributing to a proper business venture and the love of a good man. To say nothing of the admiration I enjoy from my cat.

Resolve

Sydney Walk
April 26th 1853


I am much relieved. Boo and I are friends again and we can carry on as we have done. Despite being cross with her for her silliness I am pleased it is now behind us. I cannot wait to see her and tell her all my news. She will have some ideas about the refurbishments I am sure, and she has such a good head for finance she will be invaluable in keeping my extravagance at bay.

The only shadow on my horizon now is that Dauncey appears not have forgiven me for my temporary desertion of him. He has not spent the night at the foot of my bed since we came back. I am informed that this is not unusual behaviour for a cat - Villiers was most amused by the haughtiness Dauncey displayed and was reminded, he says, of a cat that once belonged to his aunt. After a prolonged stay by the aunt in some remote part of the country, this cat refused to acknowledge her on her return and never snuffled her again despite living in her house for a good ten years more. I do not think Dauncey is so resolute, though, and I am sure he will come back to me after I have shown suitable remorse. Perhaps some milk might do the trick.

I am to visit Boo later on today - I am so keen to see her and to resume my duties as an employer at the Press that I shall take some funds with me as a gesture of goodwill. I shall hand Boo some banknotes without even waiting to be asked - that is how glad I am she has forgiven me!

Second post

Rapprochement

Sydney Walk
April 18th 1853


Dear Boo

Josiah and I are back in London. We have been much occupied with giving directions for the rebuilding of the Hall, making sure Cook is safe and other such activities and have only now returned to our winter residence.

My reason for writing to you Boo is entirely conciliatory. I am aware that you are approaching your confinement and would be sorry to miss your new baby simply because we had such a silly argument. Really, it seems so long ago now and so much has happened since (I have much to tell you if you are keen to hear it) that I hope we can put it behind us and carry on as the firm friends we so recently were.

I fancy we shall be staying up in Town for longer this year than we have done before. We cannot live in the Hall until it is entirely rebuilt and I wish to make myself available to you if you should need me to care for LB while you are getting to know your new little one. Also, I am woefully out of touch with the activities of the Press and have told Josiah that I do not wish to uproot myself again so soon. He is so enthusiastic about the rebuilding plans that he intends to go back regularly to Blindingham until the work is finished. It is fortunate, I suppose, that Mrs Cornbench has proved so accommodating - Josiah enjoys her company and that of her husband, even though I find him very drab.

I will not prattle on, Boo, until I know we are friends again. Please write back and say we are.

Yours

Effie